What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Kid 1: Mama why is my name Daisy? Mama: Because when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head! Kid 2: Mama why is my name Rose? Mama: Becuase it was a nice name.

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i like my rose red and my diamonds blue your screamin mercy so did ur mom but i killed her to

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Q: How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? A: 2, one to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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Why was the man alone? Because he was tied to a tree.

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Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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Why did the chicken cross the mobia strip? To get to the same side!

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I'm not one to tell gay jokes So I won't

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Q: Whats green and has wheels? A: Any form of motorized vehicle that is made for transportation and has a green paint scheme.

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wut did the cow say to the other cow thet's get a moo shake

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges can't talk therefore this is not a accurate accusation.

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If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

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give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

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Why was Reed sad? His mother has a penis

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Did you know? that if you were to stretch out all your organs to see how far theyd stretch? youd die.

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Roses are blue Violets are unicorns This doesn't make sense Refrigerator

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? Hi. He said it in sign language.

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You should put some sand in your vagina to make the crabs feel more at home.

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Why did the blonde go to law school? She was sick of people assuming that she was not an intelligent woman due to negative sterotypes about her gender and hair color and set out to prove said people wrong.

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what did one bean say to the other bean??? hows it been.

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Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

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Why did the blonde walk into the men's restroom? Because the blonde was a man who needed to expel his feculent waste.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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