whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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We could have had it all Rolling in the deep You have my heart inside of your hand As you've just now inexplicably ripped it out of my ribcage.

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Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket? No. A picture of a red bucket? No. A photo nailed to a red bucket, which shows a red bucket with a very realistic painting of a red bucket on it? Yes.

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There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

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Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

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What happens when you get hit in the face? You get hurt.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

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What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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Why did the little kids call the boy "pornboy" Because he showed gay porn at the bus stop

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Jake: Where's Waldo Me: Where? Jake: I don't know

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What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

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karn chevalier

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Did you hear about the black kid that had a gun? Yeah, it's a.20 gage that his father bought him for Christmas so that he could go hunting together

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Whats brown and rhyme's with "Snoop?" Dr. Dre

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Neither have I

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A man walked into a bar. He got a concussion and couldn't see strait for days.

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The cow's name was Friday, But can you guess what day it died? Monday, it had a fun weekend with its family before it was brutally slaughtered.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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