Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

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Why did the little boy rush downstairs to the living room on Christmas morning? because he heard his mother screaming rape.

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My heart is in my hands. Call an ambulance.

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A Muslim and 2 French people walked into a bar They start to have a nice conversation about Charlie Hebdo

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is quite strange, but then realizes he is dreaming. He awakes and tells his wife about it. His wife tells him to go to sleep. The bartender is now sad because he realizes his marriage is in shambles

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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KARMA KARMA KARMA KARMA CHAMELEON

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Tried to type an ascii of a penis, failed

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why are you reading these jokes? i have nothing else to do. ok

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How come grilled cheese?

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

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I like your words "He without an equal, also stands alone was it?"

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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1 tip for a flat belly so eating so much u fat bitch

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What did the cowboy say when he went into the car showroom in Germany? He commented on the models and designs, and asked to try a few out. Then he left, saying he would consider buying one but didn't want to commit too suddenly or too soon.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him to leave.

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What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

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A monkfish walks into a bar... The world blew up

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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Drew Knowles is gay

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Asian women drivers...

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Q: In 2900 A.D, why did the stars started blasting at each other and exploding? A: Because it was the time for "Star Wars".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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