Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did Timmy mow the lawn? He didn't particularly like the way it looked Why did Timmy fall down the well? He is retarded and thirsty How did Timmy die? He had stage three lung cancer Why cant Timmy drive a car? He has been dead for three years

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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Why wouldnt you want to hit a black man that is on a bike with your car? It mite be your bike

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when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

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Guest what? Dog

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An asian is doing math hw then his dad drives through the door

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There was a boy named Johnson. He was a happy boy who had a mother and father who loved. One day he didn't do his homework

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Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because he would scare the shit out of everyone, and come to think of it wasn't even sure he had been invited.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there. Not Mary!!

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What is better than one trillion dollars? One trillion and one dollars... duh.

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Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

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What did the baseball coach say to his son? Nothing. He was dead.

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John Cena for president

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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What do you call a dog that acts like a cat, likes to pretend he's human, and whose name is "Moose"? A dog. His personality traits have no effect on the changing of his species.

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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