There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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how do you drowned a blonde? put ankle weights on her and throw her in a river.

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Jesus Christ dude. Wait, aren't you Jewish?

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

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A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died

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Eight hours? Sigh, leave it to me then! We both know you are a sweetheart behind that thick skull of yours, I mean why would you ask if it bothers me then?

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

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Why did the man die when he hugged the pillow? He was hallucinating at the grand canyon.

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If a hen lays an egg in the middle of a roof, which way would it fall? To the east, as there was a brisk wind in that direction.

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Justin Beiber is a good singer

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Knock knock ... Knock knock ... Little did the man knocking at the door know that the kid was told not to answer the door when he was home alone, so the kid was hiding

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sit in the dark for about 4 or 5 hours covered in Vaseline with a huge dildo inside of your arse

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Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

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Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

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Why are all women bad drivers? All of them aren't.

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salad days!

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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You know what's stupid and gay? Idiots and homosexuals, respectively.

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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You wanna know something that doesn't exist? Grandma's.........that haven't given BLOW JOBS!

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Two biscuits were sitting in an oven. One says to the other hows it going, the other says nothing because he knows that biscuits can't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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