What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

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how many black men did it take to steal from the whitehouse? Obama.

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What did the Muslim do on 911? He weeped for the loss of his many good friends and relatives

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what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

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kieran is a homosexual

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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What is worse than menopause? Falling down the stairs breaking your next....

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Why did the boy chuck a fridge at the other boy? Because he broke his toy train.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had no conscience and therefore was not able to backup the very reason that he crossed the road.

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Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

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How do you confuse a blonde?? Throw her in a circle room and tell her to find all the corners If she comes out and says I found the corners.. then your screwed

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What's an AntiJoke? A joke that has no comical value.

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Why did Susan fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock... Who's there? Not Susan...

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A man walked in a bar and asked for 10 shots. (not descriptively) The bar tender got his gun out and shot the man 10 times. Another man asked for three stabs at it. The bar tender stabbed him 3 times. The last man asked for a bomb load. The bar tender gave him 100's of granades. Then the man bombed down the bar with the bar tender inside

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How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

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Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

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Q : Who is the most famous celebrity, Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber? A : Neither, because they are just fads.

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You got yourself a mole, I suggest you restrict all access to any and everyone that could possibly go under aliases such as: The Wiz. Azure. Dungeon Lord. Dice. Wizard, and anything similar, he is most likely a computer geek which does not necessarily look like one.

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What would Abraham Lincoln do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.

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Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

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What's dark, scary, and full of puppies? My van. I lied about the puppies...

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Why did the black man actually receive an education. Because he is entitled to one as a citizen of the US. Frederick Douglass, at the twenty-third anniversary of the Emancipation Proclamation stated that "Education, the sheet anchor to a society where liberty and justice are secure, is a dangerous thing to society in the presence of injustices and oppressions...." Douglass knew that in order for black people in America to survive, they had to be educated because it was the one area that could make the weak person strong and the black person equal. By the time the modern day Civil Rights Movement started, its leaders already knew that education was knowledge, and that knowledge was power. In order for black people to gain their equality, they would have to have a solid foundation to stand on, and that foundation would be education.

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How do you get 100 Jews into a car? You can't. It's physically impossible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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