What's 18 inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I was on the other side. And I'm a chick magnet

Q: Why did the guy fall off his bike? A: He got shot!

Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

Hey Babies, The holocaust called, they want their screams back

Hoverboards are still not available, and it's already October 21, 2015...

Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

Hey Lady Gaga, Madonna called, she wants her clothes back; she lend them to you weeks ago for a concert because you didn't have anything to wear and you haven't returned them yet.

What does Mitt Romney approve of flip flops? They feel good on his feet.

Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

Why was Timmy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face

What is worse than a nuke exploding? Going to the hospital and finding out you have cancer and aids.

Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

A boy kills DEER & cooks it & doesn't tell friends what it is. He gives a clue "Its what my girlfriend calls Me!..

Roses are black. Violets are black. Black people are black, And you're a douche.

Why did the fish fly It didn't

if you don't like this you're gay

But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

What Do You Call a Hawk in Virginia? A Hawk What Do you Call a Hawk that lives in Virginia? Virginan Hawk

A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

Why did the little girl fall of the cliff? Someone pushed her

What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes......

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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