Whats the difference between a garage full of dead babies and a garage full of money? I don't have a garage full of money

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

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12345678910111213141516171819whatcomesnext

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I was going to tell a gay joke. But that would offensive

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

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Q. what is black ans white and red all over A. a shot to death zebra

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

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Q: How do mentally retarted people read books A: They dont

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Why is Texas so hot? The sun

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the car.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Fetus Blood. Due to the low concentration of iron, it gives it an aroma of paint.

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Want a fight? You Spelt F**K wrong O.o

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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What will your friend do after you kill him? Nothing, he is dead.

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how to name your chinese kid. throw a spoon dow the stairs

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A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

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Why did the little girlbnot wake up? Because her mother smothered her in her sleep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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