Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

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"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" "Two dead kittens."

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What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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a man paints himself yello shrinks himself and walks into a baber shop then he relizes that the sizers are yello so he gets cut up into shreds and dies. THE END!

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why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

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What do you call a black woman working at a bar? A Bartender. What do you call an asian woman working at a bar? A Bartender.

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How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar They are friends and continue to have a pleasant evening

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what does a jet and plane have in common? the letter "e"

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A blonde a brunette and a ginger jump off a cliff they die upon impact and their families mourn for years to come.

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Why did the girl scream? She was being raped.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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a man walks into the bar and gets knocked out

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What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

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How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A worm in your intestinal tract.

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Friends are like balloons.. If you stab them they die.

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Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

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A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

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Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops