What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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What is Obamas favorite book? I don't know, ask him.

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What do you get when you cross a black guy and a keyboard? A black guy punctured by a keyboard

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What's green and gets you high? Marijuana.

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Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

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What does it mean if you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars? You both have five dollars

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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how do you win a game try your best

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knock knock who's there? ketchup ketchup who? better catchup with me!

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Why was OJ Simpson's knife covered in blood? Because he just murdered his wife.

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Why was the black man out of a job? because he was recently laid off and had not found any job offerings that he would be interested in

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Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

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You're Like A Book I Want To Put You Down

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what do you call a chicken thats little? a chicken. I lied about the little part

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was Dead.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? rape

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knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

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this isn't an anti joke but you guys remember teletubbies?

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Yo mama so fat......Hiroshima.

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What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern p.o.r.n-o collections.

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96

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Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops