Knock knock. Who's there? Silence. Silence who? No, I meant there was silence, I didn't really say anything. Oh, OK. But seriously, who's there?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the chicken cross the road? The question just posed is unanswerable, as in order to state the reasoning for the chicken crossing the road, one would have to assume the a chicken has a concept of 'road'. As the chicken is an avant, we can safely say that it has no need of pavements/ sidewalks or roads. As a result, it cannot possibly have an incentive for doing so. Consider the following hypothetical analogy: you are walking in a forest, and you unknowingly cross another animals scent trail. You cannot possibly say WHY you walked across the scent trail, as you didn't know it was there. You can state your reasoning for walking in the first place, but not for crossing that specific scent trail. In conclusion, this question is unanswerable, due to the chicken's lack of knowledge about roads.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a metal bar He had a swell time.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Man walks into an apple store. Shortly after he leaves with a fully charged phone.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is the best joke ever? 1D

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why couldn't Jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock knock! Just kidding.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike they both taste good

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many kleptomaniacs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's yellow and shouldnt be in this country. The asian girl in my economics class

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What does the fox say? A scream-y howl. A shrill, hoarse scream of anguish, it sounds more than anything like a human baby undergoing some kind of physical torture.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why couldnt hellen keller drive a car? because she was a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did they chicken cross the road? It didn't. A van ran it over when it was halfway across.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Ed Milliband knows what's best for the UK.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did it look like the girl peed herself? Because she peed herself

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do Justin Bieber and Eminem have in common? They both need to get a life. I lied about Eminem.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I man walks into a bar. He drinks four beers, gives the bartender his keys, and takes a cab home. The next day he gets his best friend to drop him off at the bar, picks up his car, and is three minutes early to work.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops