SUCK MY NUTS

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A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

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What's the difference between a melon? One of its halves are both the same.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

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Why does the Batman theme song have 'na na na na na na na na' in it so many times? I guess Batman really likes sodium. Or maybe his record player's broken.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

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What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

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Q: Why do Indians smell? A: Cause they have noses? Racist.

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a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

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What do you call two black men riding on a tandem bicycle? Best friends.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

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What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

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Why do alcoholics use brown bags? Because they are ashamed of what they have become and seek to repress their guilt by entering into denial.

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Q - What do you call a bunch of white people on a bench? A - The nba - Cool Bean

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A man walks into a bar a browning automatic rifle, it accidentally fires hitting the main artery in his neck and he promptly bleeds to death.

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Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

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Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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