Why did Susie fall off the monkey bars? She had no arms.

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Women's Soccer.

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Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing Mittens

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Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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how do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed? pick up a parenting book ask him nicely try a time out not care because he's a kid and hes supposed to jump on beds?

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Why was billy sad because in the morning he witnessed his mom get stabbed in the throat repeatedly by a clown then he saw the clown in the cop car but his mask was off and it turned out to be billys dad

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So a guy is on his way to work and he nearly gets hit by a bus. He sticks his middle finger up at the bus driver but a couple seconds later he realized that it was the same bus he was supposed to get on so he apologized to the bus driver and got on the bus. He was 15 minutes late for the 420th time this week so he was fired from his job and went back home. On his way home he was not allowed on the bus because he left his oyster card somewhere so he had to walk home. 69 minutes later he arrives home to his wife and kids. What did the man say to his wife when he got back home? "Hi."

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Why did rachels computer break ? Because she was using it in the road and got hit by a bus

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Q: How many Jews can you fit in a 4-seater car? A: 4

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You know what's funny? Rape

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What is funnier than one dead baby? Two dead Babies

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A man said hello to a woman. He was italian...

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What's the difference between a baby and an onion? I cry when I chop up an onion.

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How do you drown a fish? You don't...

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your mum is so fat her patronas is a cake...

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What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

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What did they gay chicken say to the straight chicken? .... nothing, chickens dont speek.

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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What did the dinosaur say to the human? For one, dinosaur's don't talk. And two, humans were not roaming the Earth during this time.

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Have you seen Stevie Wanders new house? No. Neither has he.

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Q how do you feel? A with a series of nerve endings, that send signals to my brain

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How do you confuse a Blondel? Tell her there's a demon in her liver

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What did the guy say to the other guy? Hello.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops