Bro: Aww Dawg! What if they tell me I got da aids? Dawg!: Hey don worry bro, you gotta BE POSITIVE

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What's worse than walking into your parents room while their have sex? Getting no-scoped by zzirgrizz

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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There's this Priest, a Rabbi and a Preacher talking about how similar they are.

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Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A bleeding penguin.

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What do you do when you're given a phonebook? You ask for their name.

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How did the drug addict die? He got shot in a drive-by.

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What do a black lesbian, Adolf Hitler and Jesus have in common? They are all the subject of this question.

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Why did the man cross the road? His mother had recently passed away after a 12 year battle with lung cancer and is visiting her tombstone.

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Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

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What do u call a six year old boy holding a gun. illegal

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour hot soup on his head.

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Why did the hipster's coffee burn his tongue? He drank it before it was cool.

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What would Jesus say if he was alive today? “Nehwê tzevjânach aikâna d'bwaschmâja af b'arha.”

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why did benny go to the 4th grade school nurse? he had a massive erection.

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What do a boat and a computer have in common? Nothing

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I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

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what did the rapist say to the girl? get in the van

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Whats red but smells like blue paint? Red paint

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Why is Apple so successful? Well, that is not a question that can be answered simply. Many factors are involved in this, including but not limited to marketing, customer support, and smart business strategy. For more information, please visit Apple's website.

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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Why was Jimi's mom sad? Because Jimi suddenly fell to the floor clenching his neck while saying "I'm Dying!"

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q

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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