what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

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What's the difference between a bench and a Mexican? The bench can support a family.

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You know what the stupidest country in the world is? Equatorial Guinea

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Nobody know he couldn't open it.

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Why did the boy drop his iceccream?? He got hit by a bus??

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Hey, have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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what has two lags and red all over? :a cat in a chinies restrunt...

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

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I don't often drink beer, but when I do, I make the poor decision to attempt to drive while intoxicated, kill a pedestrian, and end up in jail with a hangover, a DUI, and an account of vehicular homicide. Don't drink and drive simultaneously.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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How did the American man get the Mexican man to jump over the wall? He didn't, after several attempts he then got a ladder and climbed over.

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for x-mas a bike

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Anyone can post anything.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

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How come the kid couldn't go to college Because he was black and couldn't afford it

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why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

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what do you call a woman that didnt make you a sandwich? An ambulance

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What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

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Not from my wife if that is what you think, but its best people dont know who she is, because you know... A guy that gets many ladies = A playa. A girl that lets his guy do that, well, my wife feels safe about her husband (I am dead honest), but I cant expect people to suddenly go "oh yeah, his wife is totally cool and secure about it all, rather than an insecure idiot that allows him to sleep around like the dog he is) Strictly spoken, I am no dog, women say all men are pigs, but no woman settles for a boy, so that makes me a pig.

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Q: If Elvis was alive today, what would he crave the most? A: Brains. Moral: BRAAAAAAAAAAAINS!

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Why did single women didn't want any babies for? because of Ice Ice Baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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