Why is it wrong to love your neighbour? You would be loving a dickhead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a man holding a shotgun was chasing him

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house... knock knock who's there the chicken

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 6 feet under the ground? Doug What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 3 feet under the ground? Douglas

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What did the man with the gun say to the man without the gun? I have a gun

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what do you call something that dosint exist? nothing.

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Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

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What is small, black and has 18 legs? A centipede with 82 legs cut off.

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What's brown and smells like poo? Poo.

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What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

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Why are there no Jews in hell? Because Hitler is there,

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Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

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When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

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What did the rabbit say to the man nothing animals cant talk

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Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

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Why did grandpa climb the phone pole with bananas in a backpack? He has a debilitating disease. He is slowly losing touch with reality.

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Why did the Triceratops walk into a grocery store? To buy groceries

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Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

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What's black and blue and is scared to death? the kid in my trunk

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Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

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why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

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What do you call a man with no arm or legs lying in front of a door? Idk, but how did he get there, and where is his aid to help him get out of this situation?

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There were 3 men on a rough each granted one wish to make. The first guy sees a bird and runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a bird and he flies away. The second guy sees a butterfly so he too runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a butterfly and flies away. The third guy telling himself those were all stupid wishes, makes up his mind what he is going to wish for so he runs to the ledge and just after he says "I wish to be" he trips on the ledge and says, "shit!" So his wish was granted and shit he became. The End.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops