Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Doctor Harold Boo, I was your grandmother's primary caregiver, I'm here to inform you that she died of a massive heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why was the little boy happy? Because he wasn't in the penn state locker room.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's long and black? A long and black object.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Knock knock Who's there. Interrupting cow, sorry you can see where this is going, just let me in without asking any more questions please.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why couldn't the pirate enter into the movie? Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

stinky boner

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Your at a racism seminar. You learn not to call black people the n word but you know they really deserve it

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

how come the tadpoles dad told him he can't be a nurse? he has 2 b a frog!

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's better than getting second place in the paralympics? Having legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Going out for a quiet one, having a drink or two, and returning home.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Correctional officer asks an inmate. "Does your elevator go all the way up"? Inmate replied. I don't know we always use the stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What do you call the offspring of an elephant? A baby elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Whats the difference between a jew and a canoe? Canoes weren't killed by Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A terrorist.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's more funny than 10 dead babies in the bottom of a trash can? 1 dead baby in the bottom of 10 trash cans...

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the man walk into a bar? Coz he felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

thumb_up thumb_down -32

what did the man living in the box buy with his new found money? A bigger box.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Whats the difference between anne frank and osama bin laden? Nothing. They were both found eventually.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops