A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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What do a banana and helicopter have in common? Neither is a police officer

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What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

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Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

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Why did the black man die? Kidney Failure.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Who the f*** let out the chicken

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How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

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What is "race car" spelled backwards? rac ecar.

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If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why do beavers have flat tails? They don't know but their relatives certainly get upset

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A blonde walks into a bar. That's it.

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Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was an animal with a small brain and could not comprehend the situation.

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Chris: Hey, want to hear a sad joke? Joe: No, those are mean and offensive.

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What's the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are $1.50 and deer nuts are under a buck.

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops