whats worse than failing your maths test?

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

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If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

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what happened to the man that no one cares about? No one cares

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Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

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A: What Santa said when he caught Mrs. Claus with one of his elves... Q: What is "Ho ho ho?"

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Ask me if i'm a serial killer Are you a serial killer? Yes and I killed your family

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who Doctor Octagonapus! BLAAAUUUUGGGHHHH

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Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

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How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting ass-raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

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Like this if you want people to stop asking to have their jokes liked.

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Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

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A black guy pulls into a KFC drive thru and orders some chicken. The cashier tells him that they are out of chicken, so the black goes to McDonald's instead.

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

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Three men walk into a bar. Something happens not at relating to them.

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Why is six afraid of seven. Because seven is a rapist.

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What did the man do when he crossed the road? Nothing he got hit by a car

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Q: What's worse than a worm in you're apple... A: The fact that you have all-timers and can't remember...

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse says "my wife has cancer"

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I'd tell you a joke about Uganda but it wouldn't be worth it as it probably would keep a low score and possibly even get deleted for staying a week with a negative rating, for a number of reasons including that it isn't particularly funny, it was copied from another website and it is slightly racist. Taking into account what most people look for in a joke, it doesn't necessarily meet their needs and would more than likely fall into a lame category. And for that reason I have not submitted it.

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Why'd the girl fall off her bike? She rode over a curb

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Im 8 years old, sometimes I get sick, and I take medicine and it makes me feel better. My daughter has cancer.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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