Holy shit Lawman! Next thing we know Nero comes back from the death! Seriously get over here stat and get "my men" under control here! So that last damn Moral was for you! I never understood why he picked me, so he never picked me at all... Man am I relieved! Do you ever fucking get tired of playing the hero? I basically ended up declaring war on Nero`s on people here, what should I do?

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Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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What is Corey Jacobs favorite kind of sandwich? Big Jumbo Kahona Burger!

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all the kids had fun

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

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There were two mufins in an oven. They did not say anything because muffins are incapable of speech.

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You decide, drink or drive. But don't do all 3 at the same time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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Why didn't the Orphan finish his lemonade. His legs got chopped off.

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A Priest a Rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The rest of the patrons continue to drink until the situation seems less strange.

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Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

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What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

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Me: f*** off Asshole: YOU'RE MOM! Me: -is dead.

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what's white and sticky semen

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A man goes to a gas station to pump gas in his car. After about 7 minutes, he leaves.

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Why didn't Michael Jackson celebrate his birthday? He's dead.

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What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

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Why did the black man get arrested? He didn't pay child support for his 12 bastard children

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what is red white and blue? the french flag

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What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

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Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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