two muffins are in an oven and one turns to the other and says,'' hey, it sure is hot in here''. and the other one says," holy crap, its a talking muffin!''

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

joke hahhahahah where did u find that joke, on the internet

Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

Q: What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? A: You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

what do you call an albino brown bear a polar bear

What do you call a homosexual in a wheelchair? A cripple

There's a study that the population of Americans are very high in America.

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor an the doctor said, "I am calling Child Protection Services."

a black man, a jew, a mexican and an irish man walked into a bar and the bartender says: This is joke right??

A police man pulls over a blonde for speeding. The policeman tells her she was speeding and starts to write a ticket. She get emotional and begins to cry. He writes the ticket, she signs it, and she drives off.

Q. What did little John get from reading this. then wait and you will see that the person who you were asking the question will give you a series of awkward faces until they lose interest

Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

whats the difference between slade , and wizard? wham

A man walks into a Library.... And asks for a book.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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