what do you call a small midget? a smidget.

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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Who wants $300? Me too.

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

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Whats worse than finding a worm in a apple? Getting raped by a skorpian

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I've always hated people saying "last one there is a rotten egg" because don't you want to be a rotten egg so you don't get eaten?

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What's the first thing that goes through a persons mind when they get shot in the head. The bullet.

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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Why did Sandra fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock Who is there? Not Sandra

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

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A man walks into a bar. Realizing he forgot his ID, he leaves.

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What do you call two babys with one head? I dont know either, answers on postcard please!

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Knock Knock ............... No one's home.

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Why was the 7 year old girl crying? Because its hard to laugh during gang rape.

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The priest leaves because they don't have wine.

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A beautoful poem: Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun! gimme all your money!

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How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

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Charlie Sheen is winning

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Where's my tractor?

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SUCK MY 29 AND A HALF FOOT LONG DICK BITCH JUST KIDDING............ IT IS 69 FEET LONG GIGADY

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why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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A Jewish man walks into an ice-cream shop. Using the money he ha eared from his full time job, he orders a chocolate ice-cream in a waffle cone.

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you that read wrong no you typed it wring my mind just rearranged the words to make grammatical sense

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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