why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Why did the two children go sledding? Because they liked to sled.

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If a tree falls on a woman, and no one is around to hear it, what is a tree doing in the kitchen?

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Easter? A: Diabetes

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why dont you hit a black kid on a bike? its probably your bike.

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

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An airplane flies due north at 100 m/s through a 30 m/s cross wind blowing from the east to the west. Determine the resultant velocity of the airplane.

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Your momma is so black that she probably has ancestors indigenous to Africa.

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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What poops,smells bad,burps,wears diapers,farts,and screams spank me with a bib on That Depends what you do on saturday nights

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what do you call a man with no arms no legs cancer and down syndrome? you call him stephen because his name is stephen

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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an irishman walks past a bar a.w. j.p.

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38 studio's new game... Finance City

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What did Robin say to Justin Beiber? You're gay. Angus L.

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Did you hear about the guys who were going to France? Well they are not going anymore.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken so he could fry it.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

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Doctor, Doctor I think your gay. thats because i am

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Why did the little girl with no arms an legs cry? Because she fell off the swing.

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

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Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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