What's blue and rhymes purple? Get Out

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Yo mamma's so fat that the gravity required to keep her on the ground is significantly smaller than an average sized human.

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Your dad isn't gay...but his boyfriend..HES REALLY GAY!

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

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how many jews fit in an oven? none, its illegal to put a person in an oven....

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What's sad about a dog and it's owner dying in a car accident? They were on their way to the vet.

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whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

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What does Adolf Hitler hate more than Jews? Nothing.

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Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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when you smile the whole world stops and stares for a while because you have one tooth and its half chipped.. and your a black mexican red head.

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How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

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What has eyes but can't see? A blind person.

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roses are red, windows are clear, get off your ass and bring me a beer

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Hitler, Mussilini, And Hideki Tojo Walk In To A Bar Mitzvah, Everyone Was Brutally Murdered & No One Survived.

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Why did Susie start shaking? She had continuous ceasars

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

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Why wouldnt you want to hit a black man that is on a bike with your car? It mite be your bike

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

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How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

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Nero, I mean it, I want you and your wife to have 15 million dollars, it wont buy you the happiness you seek, but it helps no?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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