My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

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How do you make a sandwich out of clay? Shape it like a sandwich

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Many people protest. they go home after a few hours

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What's the difference between dead babies and the holocaust? A lot.

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You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

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what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

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ask me if i am a tree. no.

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Why did the fat guy ride his camel to the grocery store? Because he didn't want to walk to the grocery store

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

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What's better than winning $500? Using it to support the Islams to destroy America

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George Bush told Jared Fogle that he did 9/11. Jared Fogle replied "I did 9 11 year olds"

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why didn't the Mexican go to college? He was caught smuggling drugs over the border and was shot.

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the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

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Your mom is so old, she was able to have children around the time you were born.

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Guy 1: Where's your dog Guy 2: I Dunno Guy 1: I ate it

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How do you make a miner sad? You cut his d*ck off then feed it to his family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He is suicidal and should probably get help.

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so a man walks into a bar, then the prison warden told him to calm doun.

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A horse walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything or say anything because it is a horse. It proceeds to walk around and knock over a few tables before finding the door.

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Roses are red violets are blue I don't know you so get away from me.

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I hear Lebron has a new phone. He has it on silent all the time. It's because he doesn't want to disturb anyone around him while they prepare for important games in which he will be an indispensable part of, especially during the 4th quarters of the NBA Finals.

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roses are red violets are blue pornhub is down ya mums facebook will do

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Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops