- Anti Joke

What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

Why was the baby flying? Because it's face was stapled to the propeller of a helicopter.

What's green, has six legs and would kill you if it fell on you out of a tree? A pool table.

Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

Why doesn't Helen Keller know how to drive? because she's a woman.

Nathan likes butt games with African American men

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

What do you call a college student who never studies? An irresponsible person

It was Jimmy's 18th bday so his parents let him have the house to himself. He ate shrooms, fucked his turtle, then had his dick bitten off.

What's worse than a paper cut? 2 paper cuts.

When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

whats not funny and has access to a computer and reasonable internet? Me

What is computers and smells like thin and fragile? dyslexic nipples.

What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

What did the fly say to the spider? Please, I have a wife and daughter.

A man walks into a bar. He's just entered into the Twilight Zone.

why did javonne choose club getaway madonna wanted to foster

theres no I in Intelligence a.w. j.p.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'who the f*ck let a horse in here, get it out now'.