Q. How can you find true love? A. Google it...duh

Why did the blonde stay in the five-star hotel? She had enough money.

Nothing if you heard a loud sound or something that was me dropping the phone, by accident, its busted, I will call you when and if all of your "facts" turn out to be true, Hey, had no idea my doppelganger would be so down to earth by the way, so I am sleepy, what about you?

Why did Isaac cross the road? Because Jake did Why did Isaac cross the road? Because mum told him not to Why did Isaac cross the road? Because Maya was there

What is the difference between a Homosexual and a Heterosexual? They are both Black.

Meh, I dont want it anymore! You take it!

What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

A black man walks into a bar and orders a shot. He then precedes to drink it.

Who won the race through the underpass, the black man or the polish man? The black man as he crossed the finish line several seconds earlier.

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

What's tall, has a really long neck, and eats leaves? My tall vegan neighbor's giraffe

A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

If a tree falls in the woods, how many animals lost their home to deforestation?

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

Q: What Did Alakazam Use To Listen Gangnam Style? A: He Used Psybeam.

What's the difference between Justin Bieber and R. Kelly? One is an arrogant asshole known for pissing on things, the other is R. Kelly.

How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

Why was the homosexual sad? Because his parents kicked him out, it was illegal for him to be married, and he had a difficult time being accepted by the society into which he was born.

An anti joke a day... really doesn't actually do that much

What did the man say to the woman before he had sex with her? "May I have sex with you, please?"

Her Majesty's Government of the United Kingdom of Great Britain

whats up with the irish jokes? Honestly im not a alcoholic so all of you can go F*** yourselfs...

Why do people make jokes about cancer? Oviously to get thier ass kicked!!! -BY:KOLBY HOOKS

Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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