How did Alice get revenge on Diane when Diane called her fat? When Alice was pregnant, she stabbed herself in the stomach and blamed it on Diane. Diane was then sent to prison for murder and received a sentence of 25 years. Alice laughed in court, and Diane was forced to commit suicide. Alice then stole Diane's husband, and she lived happily ever after.

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How many pencils does it take to get an A on a test? Actually it takes knowledge.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

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What stars with C, is hairy on the outside, moist on the inside and ends with T and has UN in the middle? Coconut

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what does wtf stand for? what? i was asking you!

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A Canadian walks into a bar, he rubs his head, steps around the bar, and walks into a bar. He has a great time hanging out with his friends and having a few drinks

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

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whatis worse then tripping over and landing head first in dog shit No alot

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What do you do when you do what the do is the do for the do to do what you're doing that's done for what she did if you didn't do what not to do? ^error

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What do you call a tree that grew in the middle of a road? Whatever type of tree it was.

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Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

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I have alzheimers and one day me and my nephew were............................

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1...Kaboom!

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Once a upon a time there was a girl named Cinderella. She rubbed a magic lamp and a genie appeared. Then a guy named Larry Harry walks into a laundry mat. 7 days later she died.

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Whats worse than getting an "F" on a test? Stage diving with a kilt on.

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What's the difference between an American and a British guy? Their fingerprints.

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What animal wouldn't you want to play games with? Probably none of them. They are animals and incapable of playing board games.

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How do you fall off a building... JUMP.

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Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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Wolfjob.

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Children + my basement + my finger = yes

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why did the dog cross the street? because it saw a squirrel

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops