Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Guess what else smells like tuna!?! A dead tuna fish in a can

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How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

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So there's a monkey in a bar. I forgot the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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How do you make a Chef cry? You kill his family.

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Refridgerator.

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Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

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a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

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What do u call a cripple Biv

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What happened to the hungry child? He got out of Africa

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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What do you call a black elephant? An elephant.

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A muslim in Iraq was sniped in the head by US forces. He was a terrorist, who killed 18 innocent people.

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compardre No Pew.. Pew.. At mi OINK.. OINKs...

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a purple river? It gets wet...

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Q: How do you make a black man nervous? A: Threaten to kill his family.

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Adam Sandler is still funny ! *cough*

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

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What do elephants and grapes have in common? They are both purple arpart from the elephant, which is grey. I lied about it being purple

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because there were no cars coming

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so a man walks into a bar *pint of bud there please

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What's big, purple, and smells like children? Barney

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops