What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

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How do you keep a woman from driving your car? Shoot her.

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What did the penguin say to the peacock? Die, you homosexual!

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What's worse than finding a baby in a dumpster? Being late on your taxes

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Knock knock, Whos there? Your adopted.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a microwave? If you don't know the difference you need a psychiatrist.

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What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

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My mother has chlamydia. That's it.

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what do a toothbrush and an ice maker have in common? ....They're both in your house.

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Q. What happened to the girl who locked her keys in her car? A. I raped her.

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Knock Knock The homeowner's acquaintance had called him just minutes prior because he had forgotten something at his house. With this having occurred, the homeowner had a strong sense of who was at the door. Being a cautious person however, he checked his prediction by examining the man through the door's peephole. Having asserted that it was what he had in mind, the homeowner opened the door and handed him some papers that were of importance to the acquaintance.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding the holocaust? A worm

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What's the difference between 2 pieces of meat? Nothing

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Whats white and sticky? Glue.

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A working black man, Santa, and the Easter Bunny where walking down the street and find a penny, who picks it up? The working black man, Santa and the Easter Bunny take no payment for their work.

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A Jew walking in the street sees a homeless person asking for charity. He reaches to his pocket, grabs a penny, greets her with a nice smile and gives away the penny.

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Your father must be an alien because he's driving a UFO

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Why didn't Jesus like Pizza? Because Pizza doesn't exist.

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A sloth walked into the dentists he was confused

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Bum: Excuse me, can you spare some change? Rich man: No

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I have alzheimers and one day me and my nephew were............................

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How did the Jew survive the Holocaust? Trick question he didn't

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where did my tractor go.

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops