Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She is a woman ... Who is blind, deaf and mute Therefore considered a danger to herself And those around her.

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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There's a black and a mexican guy in a car. Who's driving? The chauffeur.

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A Penguin walk into a bar and asks "Have you seen my brother?" And the bartender replies "What does he look like?"

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A woman walks out of the kitchen.

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What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

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A 3 year old child walks into his parents having intercorce the child asked "mommy what were you and daddy doing" she says "sex" the child was scarred for life.

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That's about as suspicious as a nun doing squats in a cucumber field.

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing. He doesn't have a cat.

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Why was Billy unhappy? He was molested by a black guy.

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What do you call a red ballon? It depends on its color duh!

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Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

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every knight i see an owl at window

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How come Helen Keller never played professional baseball? Because she was a woman

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whats green and slimy? green slim

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes And now so do you

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if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

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me and joey are going to watch the football game, at this point you relize you shouldn't hang out with joey and the other guy because it is joey and I not me and joey

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what do u say to a man walking down the street nothing, u shouldnt talk to strangers

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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A Jew walks into a bar........... he buys it.

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why aren't doughnuts square? because they are round

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two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

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What peels, is a fruit, yellow and tastes like a bannana? A bannana.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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