What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

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Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

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what do you call ten white people on a bench ten white people sitting on a bench, possibly eating their lunch

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Knock knock! Who's there? ADHD ADHD wh-? SQUIRREL!

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How do you make Bill Gates poor? You take all of his money

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Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapeled to the chicken

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What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

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Why did the bird lose all of it's feathers? It got cancer.

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Q: Why are there no tablets in the jungle? A: The pharmaceutical logistics involved would be enormous and would make very little business sense.

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

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Y did the chicken cross the rode to/ get away from KFC

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What is similar about a white person and a white fence? Mexicans jump them.

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Q. Where do all funny jokes come from? A. The people who made them up

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i dont know why but when ever i see jew they always say "whats up?"

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What do you can a boy with no arms and no legs? Names!

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Caroline Kelly.

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How many people does it take to make a fun party? Idk, that's why I asked you, you see I'm throwing a party and wantedto know how many people I should invite.

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What do you call a kid with an eye-patch and a speech impediment? Names.

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What song did Buddy the elf sing for Santa on his birthday? Happy birthday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops