Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

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What is big, grey, has 8 wheels, can fly, swim and walk. I dunno. Thats why I'm asking

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What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

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Your mother is so stupid that she has lived a very unfulfilling life due to her lack of education.

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An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

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Why did the puppy get shot? It lived in Detroit.

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What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Eating mud

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"I have a job perfromance review today!" Earl told his wife. "Good luck, I will make you a special dinner tonight," Melinda, his wife, responded.

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A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

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What's the worse thing O.J. Simpson has gotten away with? Running a red light

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Your garden's on fire.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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How do you get a black guy to stop hanging around in your front yard? Hang him in the back yard.

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So, Helen Keller walked into a bar....and then a stool, and then a counter, and then a table....

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What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

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Women's Rights

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What did the apple say to the pear? ...Nothing they can't talk...

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whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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