You know what they say about a man with big feet! They say it's indicative of the size of his penis, although there's no scientific evidence backing this up.

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Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

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Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

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Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar They are friends and continue to have a pleasant evening

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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What did Harry get for his Birthday? Nothing nobody likes Harry.

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what is the difference between Rick Perry and Lindsay Lohan? it only takes Lindsay 4 1/2 hours to finish a sentance.

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Why was the chipmunk watching TV? Because a new Family Guy was on.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why didn't Johnny ride his bike to school today? Because it is Saturday

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- Women have rights, aren't they? - Yes, they have.

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Can midgets still have big dreams?

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what did the cow say to shabab?....... want some milk

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What does the average fishermen catch Fish

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Why'd Carly fall off the swing? She got hit by a bus

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How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

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Guess what? What? You guessed correctly.

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Q) What did the Irishman get for his birthday? A) Drunk

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your Apple ? The holocust .

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What do you tell your friend who has been cheating on his wife? You're a terrible human being, and she deserves better!

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Q: why are you gay A: because your physically attracted to the same sex

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops