knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

What would Jesus do? Something that would in getting nailed to a piece of wood.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a room? A: Depends on how hard you can throw.

What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

Why didn't the boy finish the race? He was handicapped

Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

Why did the father and his son drop their cola? Because a meteor hit and killed all life on Planet Earth.

How many people does it take to make a fun party? Idk, that's why I asked you, you see I'm throwing a party and wantedto know how many people I should invite.

Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

What's faster than a black man with a TV? olympic sprinters, cyclists, street legal cars, speed boats, helicopters, commercial airliners, bullets, fighters jets, missiles, SR-71, space shuttles, rocket ships, anything in orbit, excited electrons, and quite a lot more, actually.

How did the hairless cat brush its hair? It could not, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs, making it near impossible to do such a thing.

what makes a knight in shining armor a knight in shining armor? he has to have armor and be a knight.

Roses are gray Violets are black Don't judge me I'm color blind>.>

Q: What did hitler say to his generals? a: In a circumstance as the one we have found ourselves in. Eliminating our most threatening of enemies would be very logical. Unless they were of the superior race therefore, it may be frowned apon by our low ranked comrades. Causing another assasionation attempt on myself. So in conclusion I believe eliminating a rich and intelligent race far more superior than our own, would be the best way to go. So collect the Jews of Warsaw and we might have a chance.

A man was arguing with his wife over the phone at a trainstation. She threatened to leave him he did not stop his physical abuse. The man became so mad he hung up the phone. He then noticed a blind man was grinning at the overheard discussion. The husband walked over and pushed the blind man on the tracks. He died

What did the man say to the other man. Hi

Knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Just me

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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