Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

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yo Mama so stupid that she took a piece of paper and taped it on the t.v and called it paperview.

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? your bike.

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Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? A: Because she was dead.

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A ginger man ascends to heaven and reaches the pearly gates, seconds later he wakes up in a hospital bed and realizes it was merely a near death hallucination and God isn't real.

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Why was the girl crying? She just got diagnosed with cancer you inconsiderate bastard.

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

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Q: What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage. But I don't have a pile of dead babies either. So, yeah.

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So this guy is waiting for a heart transplant. He dies.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

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How did the blonde die? Frogs teleported from the future and brutally murdered her with forks.

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If your name is coincidentally stated in this text, you will have to pay 200 of your country's currency to the person nearest to you whose first name starts with the letter G. Dexter / Ryan That is all....

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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What is the difference between Julis Ceaser, and the moon? The moon is covered in rocks and craters, and Julis Ceaser is DEAD

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No it doesnt..

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When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

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Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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Why was Emily in Alaska? Because she and some friends had been playing Simon Says at a birthday party, and the dad had said 'Simon Says go to Alaska'.

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How do you make Bill Gates poor? You take all of his money

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mary poppins' handbag is full of dick

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Why didn't the boy want his dinner? Because it was a bowl of vomit.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a whore.

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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