Q: Why was little Timmy afraid of clowns? A: The one at his birthday party killed his parents.

Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

A man walks into a bar, politely orders one drink, sips it while having social conversations with his peers, pays his tab, and goes to take the bus home. I can respect that.

How do you make a baby cry ? Throw a brick at his face

What did the cow say to his family before he left the house? goodbye, because he was going to the slaughter house to get killed for meat

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun And you don't,

Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

Why are AntiJokes so funny? Because your brain analyses them and makes you laugh.

Q:When do you club a newborn baby? A:Whenever you want to because babies are stupid

what's the difference between Michael Jackson and Acne? Acne is a skin problem caused by chemical imbalance usually found in teenagers. Michael Jackson was a singer and dancer who should've been able to escape tasteless jokes upon his death.

How do you stop a lawn mower? You throw a baby under it.

why did they bury bin laden at sea? because he died

What is a black person's favorite color? There are many different colors and it would be unrealistic to believe that all the people of a single race would choose the same one as their favorite.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

A man wakes up in the hospital after being in a car accident. He begins to yell "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor hurries into the room to find out why the patient is yelling. The doctor then promptly explains that this was due to the crash severing his spinal cord and rendering him paraplegic for the rest of his life. The doctor after explaining this states he'll never walk again, before leaving the patient's room.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

What is a turkey? The offspring of a turtle and a monkey.

What's more horrible than Twilight? Hitler.

Why did the Jews go into the shower? Because they had just finish a basketball game and they needed to freshen up.

What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had escaped from the farmer's field. The family were not too disheartened, as the rest were still contained.

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? El-if-iknow

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What did the boy say after smoking weed for the first time? -"I don't really feel anything" and his friends explained that is sometimes the case for a first time smoker.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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