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whats green and red green and red green and red? a frog in a blender.

how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

This is a joke.

My grandpa died in the Holocaust He fell from the guard tower

What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? A: Because he got hit by a bus.

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Unless she's particularly short, then she may need to get a friend, who may or may not be blonde, to help by holding the ladder.

chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

What's hard, long and screws a blond? An IQ test.

What do you get if you mix rice with slightly different flavoured rice? Rice.

how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was no traffic for miles and the chicken was in search of basic needs.

An Irishman walks out of a bar.

Urban ghettos

Knock knock. Its open.

Did you hear about the guy that told bad jokes? No.

How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

Why did the boy miss the toilet when he was peeing? Cause he was in the shower.

Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of the dark? To be honest, I don't know, and I doubt you do either. Osama Bin Laden has been a fugitive on America's Top Ten Most Wanted list for over 10 years; there is no way that you could possibly know such personal information about him if the United States government can't even locate him and prosecute him for the heinous crimes he committed against the U.S. Don't ever lie to me again.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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