A man walks into a bar, buys a pint of beer, talks to his friends for while and leaves.

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WOKE UP THIS MORNING AND SAW PROSTITUTE OUT THE WINDOW AND SAID GRANDMA GRANDMA CAN I GO PLAY WITH THAT PROSTITUTE SHE SAID NO YOU CAN PLAY WITH ME BECAUSE I'M A PROSTITUTE TOO

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What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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What do you call a Jew in the oven? The oven repair man

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whats the difrence between a japaneese and chineese person? one is from japan and one is from china.

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In Soviet Russia, the same thing that happens here, happens there.

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

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Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

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whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket.

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A man walks into a haunted house and screams. He had arrows on a nail.

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why can't hellen keller drive? Because she is visually impared and there for it would not be safe for her to drive

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Man 1: is that boy high? Man 2: No. He has down syndrome

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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What happened when the car hit the man? He died.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

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Proof that the Chicken came first than the Egg is all in the good book. It's called, The Dictionary!

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Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

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Q: What do you call a pig with wings? A: Pigs don't have wings.

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Why do Vampires drink your blood? Because the movie maker needed a story

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what's purple and plastic purple plastic

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I don't always drink beer but when I do, I viciously beat my wife and children.

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What do you call a kid with no friends? ....a Sandy Hook survivor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops