Knock knock Fuck off!

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What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

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Why does the Batman theme song have 'na na na na na na na na' in it so many times? I guess Batman really likes sodium. Or maybe his record player's broken.

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

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Q: Why do Indians smell? A: Cause they have noses? Racist.

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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How do you make a white girl commit suicide? Bully her.

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What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

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Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was to fat. Why did the snake fall out of the tree? I don't know everything, Bitch!

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Q - What do you call a bunch of white people on a bench? A - The nba - Cool Bean

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

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What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

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A blone walks into a bank in New York City and asks the bank teller for a $5000 loan because she's going to Mexico for 2 weeks. The bank teller said he would need some security for the money. The blonde tells him her new Rolls Royce is in the parking Lot and she hands him the keys. The blonde gets the money and goes on her trip. Another employee at the bank then parks the car in the underground parking garage. He later ffinds out the blonde is a multi millionaire. When the blonde arrives home from she pays back the $5000 and $15 interest. When the bank teller asks her why she gave them a $250000 car for security or needed the $5000 loan if she was a multi millionaire, the blonde answers, "Where else can you park your car in New York City and expect it to stillbe there when you return?"

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A young baby died.

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http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

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hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

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What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

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What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

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Roses are red Violets are red Bushes are red Why's my garden on fire?

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What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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