What do you call a giraffe without a neck? Dead.

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What's black and white and red all over? A blood-soaked zebra

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How did the girl cross the road? --she didn't, she died trying because she was blind and didn't see the sign that said "Don't Walk"

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wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

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Ily bae

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What's the difference between Miley Cyrus and a dead baby? One is a popular singer and the other is a dead baby.

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Q-what did lady gaga say to the retard when he asked why he's so stupid? A- Cuz baby u were born this way

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

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your mama is so fat, she sat on the ipod touch and made the ipad.

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why was the hobo sad his box was confiscated

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What is pink, red and silver and crawls into walls? A baby with forks in it's eyes

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

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Why did the asian driver crash his car? Because he was driving while intoxicated.

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What do you a badass who not a badass. Grant Lousbury.

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away? What about the vampires?

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he saw his ex-girlfriend walking down the street so he was trying to kill her by hitting her in the head with the clock.

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2 boy once went to a party. One boy dared the other to suck all the helium out of a balloon. Today this boy is know as Justin Bieber

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How did the polack burn his hands on the stove? He placed his hands on the hot stove top burners not realizing they were hot.

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There was a man driving his truck down a dark road, half way down the road he see's a man walking alone. He stops beside him, winds down his window and says "Oi mate, need a lift"? The man replies "yeah sure, but can i sleep in the back of the truck"? The driver replies "Yeah sure" later on as the man is sleeping he hears a big bang. "what was that" the man asks. The driver says "Don't worry i just hit a cow, go back to sleep". time goes by and he hears another bang. "W-what was that". "Don't worry i just hit a moose, go back to sleep and ill wake you when we arrive". Few moments latter he hears a tick tick bang. He gets up and yells "What was that"? The driver replies "Dont worry mate i just hit a aboriginal" The man replies "What was those two ticks before that"?. The driver says "I had to drive through two fences to hit the bastard"

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Why was the little boy nervous about playing with the little girl? Because she had gonorrhea.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Goodbye to the people who hated on me

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.. And IDGAF!

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On September 11th 2001, A worker of North twin tower man woke up to find his dog had chewed on his brand new phone. He went down stairs and realized his kitchen window had been broken. Getting ready to leave for work and saw his radio had been stolen out of his car. After finally making it to work and settling down in his office he spilled coffee on his lap. Enraged, the man yelled, "How could today get any worse!?"

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what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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