Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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Justin Beiber sings. people don't listen.

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Once upon a time, people died. It was happening all over the land. They didn't LIVE happily ever after... since they died. The end... for them.

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I took a vampire out for dinner last night. I expected her to cringe when I ordered a rare steak, but we decided not to let my tastes impact on the evening, sharing wine and many stories before heading back to my apartment.

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One day, a guy wanted to know if all blondes really were dumb. He gathered a stadium full of blondes, picked one out of the blondes and said,"I will ask you a few questions. First, what is 23+12?" The blonde replied,"Uh, 30." The other blondes said,"Give her another chance!" "Alright. Next question. What is 30+30?" Said the inquirer. The blonde answered, "Oh! 300!" "Give her another chance!" The blonde crowd shouted. "Alright but this is the last question. What is 1+1?" The blonde answered, "2." The blonde crowd roared, "Give her another chance!"

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who's specky and stinks of shit? josh moran

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A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first? Give us the bad news first, the parents reply. Your baby has red hair, says the doctor. Well whats the good news, ask the parents. It’s dead.

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A Fairly ghetto African-American male and a Korean Merchant pass each other on the streets of L.A. two weeks after the Rodney King riots, what happens? The merchant nods his head to say hello to the African-American and the African-American male does the same and they both live out sucessful lives. By the way the African-American just got accepted to Harvard on a scholarship program.

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Roses are blue Violets are red I'm colour blind Which is sometimes quite annoying

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Whats red and goes round and round? A baby in the garbage disposal

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Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

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A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

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How did Debbie get a black eye? Because her dad asked her to take off her pants and she refused so he beat her

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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a man offers an innocent little child some candy from his van upon arrival the child is raped and beaten suverily. -teagan doherty-

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cross light said signal said "GO"

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whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas?? - Cancer

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An elephant walks into a bar. It was so big that it broke a lot of things.

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Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops