A man was complaining about not getting enough sleep. He was then raped.

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? He doesn't have arms or legs. Why didn't Johnny have arms or legs? Johnny is a potato

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What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

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Why did the koala fall of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other koala fall off the tree? It was stapled to the first koala.

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What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

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knock knock whose there? banana? banana who? im sorry but you have to go to the doctor now.......

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

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What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Johnny had 100 chocolate bars. He ate 95 and gave 3 to his friend. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes

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What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

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A man goes to a gas station to pump gas in his car. After about 7 minutes, he leaves.

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Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

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Whats the difference between a phone and a mexican? You can't dial a mexican.

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Four blondes began their road trip from NYC to Europe and promptly drowned.

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My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

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Death by kayak

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Why are there no Jews in hell? Because Hitler is there,

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What do you get if you put a lepper in front of a fan A mess

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What's worse than the holocaust? Microwaveable jellied horse nipple

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What's Funny and has two Wheels A kids falling off his bike

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Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

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My zombie busting team: Tank: The Terminator Mechanic: Tony Stark Demolitions: Superman Medic: Gandalf Bait: Justin Bieber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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