My momma's so ugly she had to get plastic surgery. Now I need it.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's worse than a real joke on AntiJoke? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Win industrial estate, Newry

thumb_up thumb_down -32

whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

thumb_up thumb_down -32

what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Yo momma so old some said act ur age and she dies

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A man is standing on the street corner waiting for the bus. As it pulls up he steps on and pays his fare while he whistles to his iPod.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

who looks like a double rainbow? gun baby who was pregant and rapes her

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Knock Knock! Who's there? Reclu. Reclu who? Recluse Spider.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How many finger does a normal person have? 8...and 2 thumbs!!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Yo mama's so fat, that we are all extremely concerned for her health.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock-eater.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why does the girl continue to cry repetently everyday? Because she found out she was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

1 woman and 2 guys were on a roadtrip. Every single day they would go do the same things. First go to Denny's, then to the mall, then see a horror movie. One day the woman said, "I don't want to go see the horror movie, I'm scared enough!" So the guys agreed that they'd trick the woman into going to a horror movie before Denny's. They went, and the woman was scared out of her mind. She yelled at them both for 30 minutes and to this day never speaks to them.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A man walks into a pizza place and orders a pizza. When he got the pizza, he saw it had pepporonis on it. He liked that, so he ate the pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

An Asian couple walks into a bar, orders a few drinks, pays, and leaves

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What do you call a black man with no legs? A fine example of the consequences of drink driving. Make sure you are physically stable or not under the effects of depressants, drugs or any form of alcohol before deciding to use a motor vehicle.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Yogurt? You are joking right? I am having yogurt right now, do you like see trough me or something? I mean I have been told people can do that but no way!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Mikey : I wan to divorce. Miney :are u funking crazy Mikey : no I'm funking dazy !

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops