What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

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Knock knock stop knocking you idiot, it's the 21st century

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Chuck Norris isn't afraid of the dark. Because he's a grown man, and most grown men aren't afraid of the dark.

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What's the difference between Colonel Sanders and a barrel of olives? Colonel Sanders isn't in a barrel.

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Jimmy went for a walk in the jungle, and he got lost!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We can never be truly sure of the chicken's real purpose, but given the circumstances of the surroundings, the story has it that the purpose of the chicken was to physically move to the other side of said road.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Kim Jong Un thinks that he is in shape. And when you think about it, he's right. Round is a shape.

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You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

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What starts with f and ends in u-c-k? a:****

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Knock knock Who's there The military, your son died last night.

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why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

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How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

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What did the horse say to the man? The man woke up from his dream so he didn't know either

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what electronic vegetable sits in a chair? stephen hawking

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Why couldn't Jimmy wash his hair? He has leukemia and therefore no longer has hair.

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Mom says my name I reply Coming.

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Chuck Norris' beard takes 1st 2nd and 3rd in the most impressive beard catagory. He was the only contestant.

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How do you make a Cowboy cry? You kill his family.

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what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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What did the little boy say to his malignant tumour? "Hello" The tumour did not respond.

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What do you call an blonde, brunette, and a redhead? There has yet to be a definition for a group of people categorized by hair color.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because aliens dont wear purple hats.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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