What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? Its funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small. Also dinosaurs can't even talk!

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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Q: what did humoure say to lie A: u must be tellin a lie

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A man walks into a bar. Ow

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What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

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What's worse than fingering your sister and finding your father's wedding ring ? 3 bee stings.

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Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

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How did the teenage mother get her baby to stop crying? Multiple stab wounds to its throat

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"What's wrong?" "I can't fap." "Why not?" "Because I saw your face."

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when the zombie apocolypse comes what do you do? you die

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm not good at poems, nice titttttss.

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Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

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What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

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Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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Q. Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A. Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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Roses are red violets are blue I have alziemers banana cookie!

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Why did the black man lose his leg? Because he was kidnapped and tortured.

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dyslexia is like gingervitus except they are exactly alike in possible little ways with gigantic raging boners CC

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty-four year olds? There's 20 of them.

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Why did the weiner dog that punctured Doris' bladder get carried away during an oral sex session? Because the dog had a terribly troubled childhood which led to a faliure to adequately function in adulthood

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What's the only animal that has to be oiled? any animal I can think of

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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