What headphones does the farmer use? He is going through a financial struggle at the moment and cannot afford such a luxury.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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I ran out of anti-jokes. However, here's a cool math puzzle. 492 357 816 Using every number from 1-9, each row added up equals to 15, horizontally, vertically, and diagonally. Here's another cool word play TEA URN BAY Words horizontally are Tea, Urn, Bay Words vertically are Tub, Era, Any Words diagonally are Try, Bra

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Roses are red Violets are blue Flesh is green When the dead start to rise you're on my team

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What did the man say to th tiger? Nothing, a tiger is a dangerous and vicious animal. It then ripped him to pieces. Is family mourned after for a very long time till they came to grips with the death of the main income in their family. Aids

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Your mother is so ugly that I removed her from my friends list on Facebook.

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Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

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Whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with one alive at the bottom. Whats worse than a pile of dead babies with one alive at the bottom? It having to eat its way out. Whats worse than it having to eat its way out? It comes back for seconds.

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How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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What? I didn't say anything. Yes you did.

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What's funnier than an anti-joke? Sarcasm.

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How do you shock a child? Attach a metal pole to them while there is a storm

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had AIDS

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Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What happen to the girl that did the splits. Her legs broke.

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What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

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One day, I was talking to a lamp on the phone, when I realized I had called the wrong lamp.

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What did the jew say to the black man? I'm jewish

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A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

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What's black white and red all over? Steegers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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