Why did the rooster cross the road? Because he wanted to prove he wasn't a chicken.

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How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

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how many drunk drivers does it take to drive home one and only one, if more than one drunk driver tried to drive home at the same time in the same car they would surely crash and not make it home.

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So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Why are there so many little girls falling off swing jokes? Because you tuch youself at night.

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An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Mexican and an American are on a plane. It crashes due to an oversight concerning its weight limit, killing all of its passengers.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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what's purple and plastic purple plastic

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Once i tried to do math ! She wasn't getting wet so i stopped!

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What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause fuck you thats why

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

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Jim has five apples. He gives two apples to Joe. What is left? Fruit

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Whats brown a sticky, shit

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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Why did a jew die? It got killed by a nazi.

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Roses are black Violets are black A black person died

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Q.Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I don't were my cleats on my trampoline.

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The optimist sees the glass as half full. The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. The average American sees a half-finished glass of water that is not flavored and is therefore is not worth any reasonable person's time.

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What happens when an antijoke and a joke comes together? Unicorns mate with Neil Patrick Harris

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Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

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What do you call postman pat without a job? Pat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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