Why did the duck cross the road? Because he was tired of the publicity his friend, the chicken was getting for crossing the road that he wanted to do it himself. Halfway across the duck was wistfully hit by a car and sadly, his story is lesser known and 99% of the people in this world really don't care about him. Thumbs up if you're that 1% that shows sympathy toward the duck.

Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

How do you tell the difference between a white family, and an albino black family? The albino black family suffers from a lack of pigmentation, while the white family just has a naturally pale skintone.

there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

I like my women like i like my coffee... with big titis

Why did the Triceratops walk into a grocery store? To buy groceries

When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

Yo mama so old when I slapped her on the back her tits fell off.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

There was an English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man. The Welsh man couldn't make it. Again.

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

A horse walks into a bar. A chicken crosses the road. Humanity is no more. Nature reclaims the Earth.

Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? It entered a KFC and had the unfortunate suprise of having its head cut off.

What does mickee say to other animals. Mouse

roses red violets blue my name chad i stupid

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, Some don't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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