If there's something strange in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The Police.

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What do u call a man who sells hot dogs on the street? A Mexican

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Your mom is so poor She will soon have to make the difficult decision whether or not to put you up for adoption

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She won't have a pulse.

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Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

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A Mexican walks into Taco Bell, because it is the only restaurant within walking distance of his workplace.

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Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

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THAT'S RIGHT, BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER BOUGHT. LOOK WHAT A GREAT JOB IT DID ON THIS PAGE YEAH! I RECKON IT IS THE BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER DIDN'T SEE

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What do you call a man with no arm or legs lying in front of a door? Idk, but how did he get there, and where is his aid to help him get out of this situation?

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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Robert Mugabe.

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This is one LONG empty space isn't it?

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What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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Whats worse than the Holacaust? Stepping on damn Lego's. MrBounty44

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Their were three business men going on a trip, they had only one bed in the hotel so they had to sleep in the same bed. The next day guy on the right said i a great handjob last night and the guy on the left said the same thing. The guy in the middle said last night i was dreaming i was skiing

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A guy walks into a bar. He has a couple beers, gets in his car and goes home. He got arrested on the way because it is illegal to drink and drive.

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Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

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Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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Q: What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A: A pedophile.

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why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

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Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken saw some potential food across the street.

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What's black and blue and is scared to death? the kid in my trunk

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What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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