knock knock Dave's not here.

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How do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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What did the mexican firefighter name his kids? Jose and Pablo

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Coach walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, i can't serve you. You aren't wearing pants. Coach says "put it on my bill."

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Hey man. what? squidbillies.

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Q why did the girl scream A she got hit with an axe

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If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

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Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

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What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

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Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

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What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

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Q: What did the banana say as it was being eaten? A: Nothing. Bananas are inanimate objects and therefore are incapable of talking.

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A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

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Why the guy without two hands at the beach was so excited? Because he couldn't scratch his asshole.

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why do police kill so many young black men in America? it's a difficult question that deserves a thoughtful response. many complex issues are at play, but we also feel a sense that something must be done. we cannot ignore some of the forces at work here, yet we cannot all personally take responsibility, either. or maybe he wanted to steal his girl. that shit really happens. THAT SHIT LEGIT HAPAPNES.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Why did the black man die? Kidney Failure.

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Have you heard the one about the dead guy? Neither has he.

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Why did the girl miss her date? She got killed.

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My wife made me a sandwich

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why are jews so cash hungry? because like the rest of us they are looking for a way to survive and feed their family.

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I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

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6 in every 9 people find a dirty reference in every joke. This statistic is in fact false, as 5 in 9 people actually find a dirty reference.

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What do you get a man that has evreything? Aids

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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