Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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joe galasso from plainview ny

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What looks like a black book but is actually white? I don't know because it can't look like a black book if it's white.

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how come timmy didnt brush his teeth he didnt have a toothbrush

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

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What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

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Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

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the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

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The man was so gay he grew breasts and got breast cancer.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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What's worse than the Holocaust? This joke.

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he wanted to impress his wife.

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Mogok Papiti.

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why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

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Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

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Q: How do you stop a hobo from stealing your money A: You steal the hobo

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? A basketball.

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

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A man walks into a bar and breaks his nose, he asks the bartender for help The bartender says "no you're a f***ing idiot"

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What's worse then the WNBA? Nickelback.

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What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

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Nerochan, it was really nice chatting with you, I hope we can chat some other time... Please tell me why you are upset with me, just pick up the phone, I mean let me know what I did you wrong.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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